Work The Original Pilot
A pirate appeared right after the card. He confidently said to the audience “Are ya ready kids?” Then random kids reply “Aye, aye captain” They captain replies “I can’t hear you!”, the kids repeat what they said earlier and drops to a pineapple house in a sea. “Who lives in a pineapple under the sea?” The kids reply with “Spongebob Squarepants!”. After that line, I realized this was the new show Nickelodeon announced a year prior. What was the show doing on Fox? The theme ends with Spongebob using his nose as a flute. A title appears reading “Work” and credits follow soon after. The episode starts with Spongebob sitting on his bed, thinking about something. He gets on his hat, which has an anchor and some kind of suit on. He walks out of his pineapple house, and walks by a house and a brown rock. The brown rock opens up with a pink starfish stuck to the wall. “Good morning, Spongebob.” “Yeah, good morning, Patrick.” So the starfish’s name was Patrick. Spongebob walks in a loop, with his shoulders hanging low and his legs were bending back and forward. His face looked depressed as he drudged on to his workplace. He stops at a building called The Krusty Krab. He looks up at the sign, smirks, and sarcastically says “Yeah, what a great f**king place to be in.” He opens the front doors, and is greeted by a crab with a blue shirt and purple pants. “Aye aye, Mr. Krabs.” Spongebob walks to his kitchen, which is located behind a boat with a squid in it. I later found out his name was Squidward. The episode cuts to the the cashier with a costumer who resembled the character Fred. He was ordering something off of the menu from above the boat. After he finished his order, Squidward whispers under his breath “This is the one.” Mr. Krabs bursted out of his office and grabbed the costumer by the arm. The costumer was thrown into the kitchen where Spongebob was cooking some Krabby Patties. Spongebob looks at the costumer, who is in fear, and grins from cheek to cheek revealing his decayed teeth. Spongebob grabbed out a gun, somewhat resembling a pistol and pointed it at the costumer's head. “Please, I don’t want any trouble.” “You know how long I’ve been waiting to kill someone for the sake of a patty? 21 LONG F**KING YEARS PAL. Mr. Krabs has always done the murdering, I’ve always wanted to kill someone for the goddamn patties. I don’t want to murder anybody, but I have to for the sake of this god forsaken restaurant and it’s food. The patties, they are made with a special ingredient that people just like you hold that any other creature doesn’t have. We have to murder you people just to make our damn patties, and you seem like our latest victim.” A wall of the kitchen was shown and a gunshot was heard. Red blood sprayed all over the kitchen wall. A sudden screeching noise blasted out of my TV. Static started to take over the screen as the screeching noise continued. I tried to turn down my volume, but nothing was happening, the screeching noise was still the same. Colors started to flash on the screen as the screeching noise continued. Hell was happening before my eyes. I begged for it to stop, it didn’t stop. It was never ending until everything was quiet. The screen turned black. I didn’t know what was going to happen next. The episode resumed. Spongebob was shown dragging the body to the freezer. The corpse is shown, with his eyes cut out and chest ripped open. The body was frozen, and the head was chopped off. Blood didn’t drip from the head. The freezer was bare clean. Spongebob entered Mr. Krabs’ office where he is shown playing with money. Mr. Krabs quickly grabs the head and puts it in a safe, similar to the one he stored money in. He tells Spongebob to leave his office and go back to work. Spongebob enters the freezer and puts the rest of the dead corpse in a bag. Written on it is “Patties”. The episode ends with Spongebob cooking patties on the grill, before cutting to a test pattern.